Mitä vaimon tulisi tehdä.....

As salaamu aleikum wa rahmatullaahi wa barakaatuh,

Kasvun paikka. Mietittävää. Pohdittavaa. Parannettavaa. Lisäsin väleihin ahaditheja ja Quraanin ayat jotta teksti tulisi selvemmäksi insha Allaah. Pointit perustuu shaikin luennoille joita aikoinaan piti aiheesta. Lisäilen vähitellen jotta olisi aikaa pureskella ja pohdiskella. Allaah meille antakoon kyvyn tulla paremmiksi. Aamin.

99 Ominaisuutta,
jotka muslimimies haluaa vaimonsa omaavan
-Sh. al-Amry-

"Had it been permissible that a person prostrates before another, I would have ordered that a wife prostrate before her husband." (Abu Hurayrah/at-Tirmidhi)

Surah Ar-Ruum 30:21
"Among His proofs is that He created for you spouses from among yourselves, in order to have tranquility and contentment with each other, and He placed in your hearts love and care towards your spouses. In this, there are sufficient proofs for people who think."

"…treat your women well, for they are captives with you." (Hasan Sahih, reported by at-Tirmidhee)

1. Tottelevaisuus Allahia, Lähettilästä ja aviomiestään kohtaan

"Men are the protectors and maintainers of women, because Allah has made the one of them to excel the other, and because they spend (to support them) from their means. Therefore the righteous women are devoutly obedient (to Allah and to their husbands), and guard in the husband’s absence what Allah orders them to guard (e.g. their chastity, their husband’s property, etc.)…" (An-Nisa’ 4:34)

The Messenger of Allah (SAW) said,
"If the woman knew the right of the husband, she would not sit when his morning and evening meals were presented until he finished." (Reported by al-Bazzar and others)

2. hänen tulisi tehdä hyviä tekoja

Abu Sa’eed al-Khudree (RA) said, "The Messenger of Allah (SAW) went out to the prayer-ground for the (prayer of) Adhaa or Fitr, and he passed by the women and said, ‘O women! Give in charity, for I have been shown that you shall be the majority of the people in the Fire.’ So they asked, ‘Why is that, O Messenger of Allah (SAW)!’ He replied, ‘You curse frequently and are ungrateful to your husbands.’" (Reported by Al-Bukhari)

3. Olla miellyttävä katsoa

Abu Hurairah (RA), narrates the Messenger Of Allah (SAW) was asked,
"Which of the women is the best?" He replied, "The one who gives him (the husband) pleasure when he looks (at her outer beauty, or the inner beauty of her good character and how she devotes herself to obedience to Allah and Taqwa); obeys him when he orders; and does not go against his wishes with regard to herself or her wealth by doing that which he dislikes." (Sahih Muslim, reported by an-Nasaa’ee, al-Hakim and Ahmad)

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"The one who is (truly) imprisoned is the one whose heart is imprisoned from Allah, and the captivated one is the one whose desires have enslaved him." Ibn Taymiyah

Ja siis käännellä saa noita ahaditheja jos energiaa insha Allaah

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"The one who is (truly) imprisoned is the one whose heart is imprisoned from Allah, and the captivated one is the one whose desires have enslaved him." Ibn Taymiyah

4. Hänen ei tulisi poistua kotoa ilman miehensä lupaa
5. olla iloinen ja optimistinen
6. olla kiitollinen Allahille ja aviomiehelleen

From Ibn Abbass (RA), who said that the Prophet (SAW) said,
"I was shown the Fire and found that the majority of its inhabitants were women, due to ingratitude. It was said: "Is it that they disbelieve in Allah?" He said: They are ungrateful to their husbands and deny the good they do. If you were to treat one of them well always, and she then saw something (displeasing) from you she would say: ‘I have never seen any good from you.’" (Reported by Al-Bukhari)

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"The one who is (truly) imprisoned is the one whose heart is imprisoned from Allah, and the captivated one is the one whose desires have enslaved him." Ibn Taymiyah

Lisäksi tähän ketjuun olisi ehkä piristävää jos veljet voisi sanoa mitä itse toivoisi tai arvostaa vaimon ominaisuuksissa?

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"The one who is (truly) imprisoned is the one whose heart is imprisoned from Allah, and the captivated one is the one whose desires have enslaved him." Ibn Taymiyah

Minä tykkään, kun vaimo kokkaa ja kannustaa usein innokkaasti miehen joskus todella ilmapäisiä ideoita pyrkien täten salakavalasti lähestymään kohteliaasti ja saamaan miehen harkitsemaan valintaansa.
Eli siis, on kohtelias ja kärsivällinen, eikä tallustele miehen talonisäntä-egon ylitse. Myös kannustaminen kohteliaasti ja hyvin tavoin selvien pahojen vikojen korjaamiseen on loistava juttu.

7. kun haluaa kysyä jotain niin valitsee oikean hetken
8. hänellä tulisi olla hyvät tavat (khuluk)
9. hänen ei tulisi mennä ulos näyttäen kauneutensa (meikki ja hajuvesi mukaan lukien)

Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):
“O Prophet! Tell your wives and your daughters and the women of the believers to draw their cloaks (veils) all over their bodies (i.e. screen themselves completely except the eyes or one eye to see the way). That will be better, that they should be known (as free respectable women) so as not to be annoyed. And Allaah is Ever Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful.” [Surah ]

“And stay in your houses, and do not display yourselves like that of the times of ignorance” [al-Ahzaab 33:33].

The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “During the last days of my ummah there will be women who are clothed but naked, with something on their heads like the humps of camels. Curse them, for they are cursed.”

Ibn ‘Abd al-Barr said: what the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) meant was women who wear clothes made of light fabric which describes and does not cover. They are clothed in name but naked in reality.

Abu Moosa al-Ash’ari said: the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “Any woman who puts on perfume then passes by people so that they can smell her fragrance, is an adulteress.”

"Whichever woman removes her clothes in other than her house, then Allah (SWT), will tear down His cover from her." (Sahih-Jami, reported by al-Haakim and others)

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"The one who is (truly) imprisoned is the one whose heart is imprisoned from Allah, and the captivated one is the one whose desires have enslaved him." Ibn Taymiyah

10. hänen ei tulisi nostaa ääntään kun riitelee
11. hänen tulisi seistä aina hänen rinnalla (asioissa)

The Messenger of Allah (SAW) said,
"Your women from the people of Paradise are the beloved and fertile, the one who is an asset to her husband, who if her husband becomes angry - comes and places her hand in the hand of her husband and says, ‘I will not taste sleep until you are pleased (with me)

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"The one who is (truly) imprisoned is the one whose heart is imprisoned from Allah, and the captivated one is the one whose desires have enslaved him." Ibn Taymiyah

12. hänen tulisi muistuttaa miestään olemaan ystävällinen perheelleen ja ystävilleen

13. hänen tulisi tehdä vapaaehtoistyötä

14. hänen tulisi olla aina totuudenmukainen ja rehellinen

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"The one who is (truly) imprisoned is the one whose heart is imprisoned from Allah, and the captivated one is the one whose desires have enslaved him." Ibn Taymiyah

15. hänen tulisi kasvattaa lapset hyvin

16. hänellä ei tulisi olla temperamenttinen luonne

17. hänen ei tulisi vitsailla ihmisistä

18. hänen tulisi olla nöyrä eikä ylimielinen

Profeetta (saas) sanoi: Haya ei tuo mitään muuta kuin hyvää. (Bukhari)

Katso myös tämä tässä vaiheessa jos et ole vielä jaksanut lukea
http://www.islamtieto.com/viewtopic.php?t=790&highlight=haya

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"The one who is (truly) imprisoned is the one whose heart is imprisoned from Allah, and the captivated one is the one whose desires have enslaved him." Ibn Taymiyah

19. hänen tulisi pitää katseensa alhaalla

Surah An-Nur 24:30
Tell the believing men to lower their gaze (from looking at forbidden things), and protect their private parts (from illegal sexual acts, etc.). That is purer for them. Verily, Allâh is All-Aware of what they do.

20. hänen tulisi huolehtia millä tavalla katsoo
21. hänen tulisi luottaa vaan Allahiin (tawaqal)
22. hänen tulisi muistuttaa Tuonpuolisesta (aakhira)
23. hänen tulisi huomioida omista velvoitteista Herraansa kohtaan

"If a woman prays her five (daily prayers), fasts her month (i.e. Ramadan), guards her private parts, and obeys her husband, it will be said to her, ‘Enter Paradise through whichever of the gates of Paradise you wish.’" (Sahih Al-Bukhari)

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"The one who is (truly) imprisoned is the one whose heart is imprisoned from Allah, and the captivated one is the one whose desires have enslaved him." Ibn Taymiyah

24. Hänellä tulisi olla oikea tärkeysjärjestys elämässä.

Tämä siis tarkoittaa sitä, että ajavatko sukulaisten mielipiteet Islamin noudattamisen ohi vai ei? Estääkö telkkarin katsominen ajoissa rukoilun tms.

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Käytitkö aikasi ennen kiirettä? Entä terveytesi ennen sairautta tai rahasi ennen köyhyyttä ja nuoruutesi ennen vanhuutta?

24. hänen tulee muistaa hadith, että hänen mies on hänen Paratiisi tai Helvetti

A woman came to ask the Prophet (PBUH) about some matter, and when he had dealt with it, he asked her, "Do you have a husband?" She said, "Yes." He asked her, "How are you with him?" She said, "I never fall short in my duties, except for that which is beyond me." He said, "Pay attention to how you treat him, for he is your Paradise and your Hell."

Mu'aadh told that Messanger of Allaah (saas) said:
"No woman is this world upsets her husband but his wife from the among the Al-huur al-'iiyn will say: 'Do not upset him, may Allaah kill you! For his with you only temporarily, and soon he will leave you and come to us.'"

(Ja kun tiedän että tämän autenttisuutta tullaan kyselemään, monenkin siskon kauhuksi : ) Se on Sahih al-jaami' al-saghiir, 6/125, hadith no 7069, reported by Ahmad and Tirmidhii.)Ja tässä vapaa suomennos jotta otamme totisen vaarin,

"Ei kukaan nainen tässä maailmassa joka miehensä suututtaa, niin hänen vaimonsa Al-Huur al-'iiyanien joukosta sanoo: 'Älä suututa (loukkaa?) häntä, Allaah tappakoon sinut! Koska hän on kanssasi vain väliaikaisesti ja pian hän jättää sinut ja tulee meidän luokse.'"

25. muistaa, että miehen oikeudet ovat suuremmat kuin hänen omansa

The Messenger of Allah (SAW) said,
"It is not right that any human being should prostrate to another human being, and if it were right for a human being to prostrate to another human being I would have ordered the woman to prostrate to her husband due to the greatness of his rights upon her. By Him in whose Hand is my soul, if from his foot the crown of his head there was a wound pouring forth with pus, and she (his wife) came and licked that, then she would (still) not have fulfilled his right." (sahih, reported by Ahmad and others)

26. hänen ei tulisi viivytellä tai epäröidä pyytäessään anteeksi
27. hänen ei tulisi koskaan kieltäytyä mieheltään

"If I were to order anyone to prostrate to other than Allah, I would have ordered the woman to prostrate to her husband. By Him in whose Hand is the soul of Muhammad, the woman will not fulfill the rights of her Lord until she fulfills the rights of her husband; and even if he were to request her for herself (i.e. to have intercourse with her) whilst she was sitting upon a camel's saddle, she should not refuse him."
(Sahih, reported by Ibn Maajah and Ahmad from Abdullah ibn Awfaa)

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"The one who is (truly) imprisoned is the one whose heart is imprisoned from Allah, and the captivated one is the one whose desires have enslaved him." Ibn Taymiyah

28. hänen tulisi asettaa miehensä määräykset ja säännöt ennen omiaan, ohittaen hänen omat vanhemmat.

Asma bint Abu Bakr (RA), served her husband. She said,

"Az-Zubayr married me and he did not have any property or slaves or anything upon the earth except for a camel which drew water from the well and his horse. So I used to feed his horse, draw the water, stitch his water bucket, and prepare the dough, but I was not proficient in baking bread - so ladies from the Ansar who were my neighbors and were honorable used to bake the bread for me. I also used to carry the date-stones upon my head, from the land given to az-Zubayr by Allah’s Messenger (SAW) - and it was about two miles away. One day when I was coming with the date-stones on my head, I met Allah’s Messenger (SAW) and a group of the Ansar were with him. So he called me and said, ‘Ikh, ikh (a word said to make the camel kneel down.).’ in order to carry me behind him upon the camel. But I felt shy to proceed along with the men, and I thought of az-Zubayr and his sense of jealousy, and he was one of the most jealous of the people. So Allah’s Messenger (SAW) saw my shyness and so passed on. So I came to az-Zubayr and said, ‘Allah’s Messenger (SAW) met me while I was carrying the date-stones upon my head and with him were a group of his Companions. He caused his riding camel to kneel, but I felt shy and remembered your sense of jealousy.’ So he said, ‘By Allah (SWT) your having to carry the date-stones is harder upon me than that you should ride along with him.’" She said, "Then later on Abu Bakr sent me a servant to look after the horse, so it was if he had set me free." (Reported by Al-Bukhari and Muslim)

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"The one who is (truly) imprisoned is the one whose heart is imprisoned from Allah, and the captivated one is the one whose desires have enslaved him." Ibn Taymiyah

Ja suuret anteeksi pyynnöt siitä että suurin osa tekstistä on englanniksi, jos joku on vaikea niin pyytäkää kääntään, insha Allaah joku sen täällä tekee.

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"The one who is (truly) imprisoned is the one whose heart is imprisoned from Allah, and the captivated one is the one whose desires have enslaved him." Ibn Taymiyah

29. hänen vaatimukset tulisi olla kohtuullisia
30. olla yksi mutatahharaat : puhdas, aina edustuskelpoinen, wudu, puhtaat vaatteet, sekä puhdas sydän
31. tottelevainen kaikessa mikä ei ole haraam. Jos kieltäytyy sydämeen tulee musta piste. Tottelevaisuus miestä kohtaan on tottelevaisuutta Allahia kohtaan.
32. mies ei halua vaimonsa muistuttavan siitä palveluksesta minkä on tehnyt miehelleen. Älä tuhoa palkkiotasi puhumalla siitä tai muistuttamalla siitä. Tekojesi tulisi olla tehty vain Allahin tähden.
33. hänen ei tulisi paastota ilman miehensä lupaa (vapaa ehtoiset)

"A woman should not fast except with her husband's permission." (Abu Hurayrah/Bukhari vol 7 #120 )

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"The one who is (truly) imprisoned is the one whose heart is imprisoned from Allah, and the captivated one is the one whose desires have enslaved him." Ibn Taymiyah